To be a feminist or not to be a feminist? That is the question du jour.
Here’s my position—yes, I have a position.
At one point in history in the western world, the feminist movement was necessary and important. Today, a feminist movement in certain parts of the world is absolutely necessary and important.
But I live in the western world.
Women in the west have worked hard to achieve equality under the law. I thank my sisters who fought the hard fight. I fully, totally, completely appreciate their efforts. Without them, we wouldn’t have the freedom to move on to the next step.
But, before discussing the next step, let’s go back further in time for a bit and check out what happened between men and women--a basic summary. It’s super relevant.
Take into consideration the entire history of humanity. Homo Sapiens evolved somewhere around 300,000 years ago (some say 400,00, some say 200,000).
Somewhere in the range of 30,000-20,000 years ago, we have the beginning of the “modern” human being, the Cro-Magnon. At this time, we know that humans had a spiritual practice of some sort. We know that this spiritual practice included veneration the feminine principle, the goddess. The goddess and the god were present in tribes and cultures around the world. The masculine and the feminine were both divine and both venerated as such. Harmony.
Then around the third millenium B.C.E. patriarchy started to establish its roots in various parts of the world, driven by a people we call Indo-Europeans. They led invasions into Europe and the Near East with their system of warlike, male, sky gods.
And there we have it. Out of this patriarchal state, three major religions (we know which ones) were born and systematically and consciously obliterated the goddess from the human experience.
From that point on, we have the rise of patriarchal governments, religion, culture, society, points of view. etc. and all the disaster and catastrophe that comes along with it.
So now not only has the goddess been seized and tamed, human women are going the through the same domination and control as did the goddess.
Women have suffered. Greatly. Women around the world are still suffering greatly. My heart is heavy as I write those words.
Even though in the west, we now have protection under the law (which doesn’t mean that all is perfect for us, as we all know). But, we also have the cellular memory of the suffering of our ancestors. Consciously and unconsciously, we are still living the pain of the patriarchal domination. Furthermore, the fact that the majority of women in the world are still suffering greatly, we are also carrying their pain.
HOWEVER, compared to the entire history of humanity, meaning 300,000 years, a patriarcal world has been around for only a couple of seconds. What is 5000 years compared to 300,000 years? Even compared to the Cro-Magnon days, 5000 years compared to 30,000 years is short.
Yes, our pain is real and alive, but it’s not permanent and it hasn’t been so for very long. It can be healed quite quickly if we want it to be.
As a western woman today, at this time in history, we have a GREAT responsibility. It’s huge.
We have the responsibility to move on, to consciously initiate, nourish and sustain the reconciliation of the masculine and feminine.
I think, I’m not 100% sure, but I think that at this point in human history, western women are the only ones who can really lead this movement. 1. Our basic security is protected (or it’s supposed to be) We don’t fear for our basic security all day, every day (again, recognizing that this isn’t the case for every woman in the west) 2. Even though the patriarchy has tried to cut us off from our connection to the goddess (earth and the physical realm), thanks to our periods, childbirth and breastfeeding, we have maintained a certain connection to HER. ( Men are pretty much totally cut off and it will be much harder for them to get reconnected.)
We are in a unique position.
So onto this “next step” that I was talking about.
The next step begins when women STOP trying to be equal to man. Stop holding men up as the standard that we must rise up to, be treated fairly as. We are not men. Why on earth do we want to be equal to men, aside from under the law?
We as women need to remove men as the point of reference for our existence, well-being, happiness and self-expression. We need to dig deep into ourselves and find ourselves as women.
Women’s goal today is to be able to live fully as women. What does it mean to be a woman? What does a woman who is fully realized look like? What does she do? What does she say? What does she think? How does she love? How does she express herself? Completely autonomous of the masculine, what is this woman like? Can we even begin to imagine who we really are when we stop seeing ourselves through the eyes of men?
It’s so easy to look at all the ways we think men see us and say “Nope, that’s not me, that’s not me, I’m not like that, I refuse to be that, etc” What’s difficult is to say and be what are ARE, as opposed to just resisting that which we are not.
It’s up to us to accept full responsibility for our state as a women. It’s our responsibility to embody the divine feminine. This is our work today.
It’s time to stop punishing men, stop complaining about what men do or don’t do. What they’ve done or not done. It’s not men who are going to give us the permission to fully be who we are. How can they, when most of us women don’t even know who we want to be? And it’s not their job. It’s ours. It’s in accepting full responsibility that we find our strength and courage. Asking for permission is for little girls.
Men have greatly suffered as well, in a world where the goddess doesn’t exist. We must accept and recognize this fact. No one can be cut off from the masculine or the feminine without experiencing pain.
Because we still carry suffering in our memory, we punish men unconsciously in our daily lives. I don’t want to go into a list about the ways that we women today are unconsciously castrating men, but we are, from openly browbeating them to smothering and mothering them. Look for examples in your daily lives and you’ll see what I mean.
It is definitely not in rendering men weaker that we become stronger. In the end, a man whose divine masculinity has been taken away is the man who seeks to dominate and control. When he is in his own power, in full embodiment of the divine masculine, the need to dominate is non-existant. We can not afford to manipulate men and take away their inherent divinity.
When we fully embody the divine feminine we inevitably awaken the divine masculine and we want this divinity alive and well!!! Because we carry pain, we are fearful of what are world where men are divinely empowered might be like. It can be scary to imagine when we are in a position of weakness. But, when we women are divinely empowered, we can see that there is nothing to fear in the divine masculine. There is only love and reverence.
I want my man to be a god (which he is, of course<3). A divine man. I don’t want a castrated, submissive dude that I can boss around. Ew. Nor do I want to be bossed around and controlled. I am not his mother and he is not my father. We intend to fully embody the divine gender we were born into. We are equal under the law. We are equal in our relationship. We are equal as leaders of our household. Yet we are different. Sublimely different.
It is both of our responsibilities to keep ourselves—not the other—in check. To find the right balance, to neither dominate nor be submissive, to forgive and move on. It’s not easy. But it’s a duty and a calling. We are responsible for ourselves and for the whole of humanity. Yes, the whole of humanity.
So….the next step? Here it is: full embodiment of the divine masculine and the divine feminine.
Full embodiment of the god and the goddess.
Ladies, take care of your part.
Men will wake up simply by the radiating presence of the goddess in daily life. She is that powerful.
Stop punishing and forgive even if it hurts.
Find out who the goddess is.
Be a goddess.
Founder and Director of Divine Alchemy Yoga School
Incarnez la Déesse avec mes séances de yoga thème DEESSE!
Become a Vinyasa Yoga teacher.
Join our exceptional 300h teacher training program.